By Jennifer Jim

It's completely normal to feel the baby blues after giving birth. In fact, Johns Hopkins University reports that about 85% of new moms go through this emotional rollercoaster. It's easy to brush these feelings aside as just part of the journey, thinking they don't really need attention or support. But here's the thing: even the so-called "normal" baby blues can significantly affect those precious early weeks with your newborn.

The baby blues are essentially a whirlwind of emotions. One moment, you might be overjoyed, and the next, you're overwhelmed and in tears. It might seem odd to feel so happy and yet so tearful at the same time. This emotional upheaval is due to the hormonal shifts in your body after childbirth. These changes can lead to feelings of anxiety, restlessness, and tears, which typically subside within the first month postpartum.

Even though it's common, the emotional toll of the baby blues on new moms can't be ignored. Shedding tears at every turn, whether from happiness, sadness, or excitement, can be bewildering. And, unfortunately, this emotional rollercoaster is often misunderstood by those around you. Questions from your support network might feel more like judgments, and innocuous inquiries such as "Why are you sad when you have this beautiful baby?" can seed doubts in your mind.

I recall a time when I was documenting my birth story, encouraged by our doula as a healing exercise post-delivery. There I was, tears streaming down my face, yet feeling an overwhelming sense of love. When questioned by others, it was suggested I stop journaling because my visible emotions were causing discomfort. But the truth was, I wasn't sad; I simple felt utterly out of control with how my emotions were pouring out. It's hard for anyone not experiencing the baby blues firsthand to truly understand it.

Luckily, just because something is common doesn’t mean there aren’t ways to help get through this rollercoaster period of emotions. Here's what can help manage the baby blues:

Acknowledge Your Feelings: Accept that your emotions, in all their complexity, are valid. Recognizing the normalcy of fluctuating feelings is a crucial step in coping.  A simple reflection of “it makes sense to feel…” can soothe your distress.

Audio Journaling: Consider keeping an audio journal to voice your thoughts and feelings. It's a powerful way to process emotions and monitor your mood over time. Speaking your words aloud can be incredibly comforting. There are apps available that offer free minutes each month, or you could simply use the Notes app on your phone.

Sleep: Although not easy to accomplish, whenever possible, get some rest. Lack of sleep can intensify the baby blues, so catching some Zs no matter the time of day can be a game-changer. If you can arrange for someone to watch the baby, aim for a 90-minute sleep cycle to reap the benefits of deep restorative sleep.

Professional Support: Even if it's "just" the baby blues and not postpartum depression, seeking professional help can be incredibly beneficial. Don't wait for things to get worse.  A quick virtual appointment with someone who understands what you’re experiencing and can offer support and guidance during this time can provide a huge sense of relief. 

Adjust Expectations: Be gentle with yourself and adjust your expectations of what you can accomplish daily. The gap between what we think we should do and what's possible can be vast, especially in those first few months. Remember, just because you can doesn't mean you should. Your priority should be your mental and physical well-being so you can focus on your baby's health.  

So if you’re preparing for the birth or you’re in the middle of Baby Blues right now, give yourself permission to feel without doubt, seek support at any level of struggle, and prioritize your well-being during this transformative time.  

Reference:

https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/wellness-and-prevention/postpartum-mood-disorders-what-new-moms-need-to-know